My Story...

As a little girl i hated "girly" clothes, the piles of pink and puple shirts and dresses were my arched nemesis. As i grew older I expressed myself as a tomboy more and more, khaki shorts, tanks, and sweatpants. My older sisters and younger sisters were always so stunning, beautiful so in tune with fashion. I was the ugly duckling. My older sister Star picked out and dressed me since I was a little girl up until my 17th birthday. Around that time, my little sister Sabbah was already emerging into a fashion icon. Where ever we went she was "fresh", "fly". Me on the other hand I was just chilling, It never meant that much to me to my head was in the books, my feet either on the stage or on the track. I had no time to try to be beautiful, I had to keep it SAVAGE! Thats the only way I knew how to maintain sucess. Late into my junior year, I felt like things needed to change. I had a boyfriend! I needed to look like a girl, feel like a girl. I began to mimic Star daily. Heels and big bags to school, tightly fitted sweaters I was cute lol. The only problem was I couldnt really walk in heels to well, and when people mentioned something about it I would run to the bathroom and just cry. Everything I wore was designer labels but no one seemed to notice. Girls in highschool were wearing Nike outfits and here I am standing in Michael Khors heels and nobody gives me the slightest compliment. I could not fathom what the problem was, why did fashion despise me? My senior year I tried more, me and sabbah fought every morning over different pieces. Heels were a must , even though I had a funny walk. I wore plenty of tight dresses, a few of the latest air maxes, Lord knows my bob game was up to part. I was cute but I still was a non-factor. The turning point was during my senior track season, I ran at Florida relays and it went horrible. My ankle was in so much pain. Meeting up with a doctor and physician they explained to me the damage wearing heels often had on my ankles and feet. If i continued to wear them daily for 7 hours running would be difficult. My freshmen year of college I came in thinking this campus is way too big to wear heels. Soon enough being in an environment that was anti-teambaldhead, took a toll on my self-esteem. I tried to buy clothes my other teammates did, It was always hot on them but blah on me. My only spark was my fascination with scarves. I started buying scarves like crazy, using them for headwraps, belts, anything. Then it was like a domino effect. I decided that I can like clothes, and fashion and it doesnt matter if I was not a fashionista my whole life. My life starts now! That was this summer two months before my 20th birthday, I finally found the courage to find my own way. I started destroying, bleaching, and cutting clothes I always hated. Like this one fleece knitted dress, HORRIBLE! I actually am pretty good at what I do. Im still finding my way but I have learned to embrace myself, my mistakes, what others hate that I love. Most of all i have confidence. And if you were wondering as of today women step back when I walk in heels because my walk is quite intimidating or so i've been told.

No comments:

Post a Comment