Valentines Massacre

For the past few weeks I have refused to write. Frustrated with myself, the ongoing battle between what I believe and what my heart feels. Getting closer to date I dreaded what might come. Mentally I prepared myself for the worse. He'll probably ignore me, forget about me and lose my number. The mind blowing events I experienced this week will always be cherished. I didn't receive an expensive gift but what I feel in my heart I know it to be real. II don't have to guess anymore, or feel as if he doesn't notice. The words we shared, the sacred unspoken. I may have never been this comfortable around any man. I never smiled this hard. This week I had my first "movie" kiss. I can't even explain how I feel. ,Anita baker radio is what I'm feeling. Something so unexpected like love is here again.

F(fashion)oreign Relations

For the past few days I've been straining my eyes trying to consume every concept of international relations. Well realistically everything inclusive of chapters 1-7. Preparing for my makeup exam my professors review haunted me. "I can careless about the definition, I'm concerned about your understanding of the concepts". Aimlessly I stared into my pinewood desk. At such a critical hour, all I could think of was Chanel's show, (the app is amazing) thats when my vintage beret hat made the paradigm of liberalism clear. Of all the theories in my textbook I am appalled fashion has not been included. Fashion is what brings together the EU the Americas, and Asia. The similarities and socially aspects liberalist speak of are expressed through springs 2012 collections. American designer Marc Jacobs is at the head of the LV house, bridging American and French fashionistas together, who in return set norms and trends to the world to come.

Trouble sleeping

Girl problems

Terrified by my feelings, I seldom allow myself to think of you. I am not scared to love you, I am only afraid that once you discover that I do all will be lost. Love beats upon my chest, her weight is heavy like bricks. Sitting at the tips of my tongue, anxious to reveal my deepest secret. She has no eyes, she is unaware that you belong to everyone and no one. All she wants is for me to tell you she is here. She's been around for quite a while now, and it seems almost everyone can see her but you. You see there's only two type of men worth writing about the man you despise and the man you love. Sweetheart you are truly the latter. I am intrigued by what I don't know about you, what you have been through, your smile during times of hell. Your craving for knowledge, to know about everything around you. The fact of the matter is I feel as if it would be impossible for you to ever love me, it's crazy for you to even like me so soon, but how I feel is true. I am helplessly in love with a man, I shouldn't have met. Head over heels for the time I spend wrapped in your arms, or rubbing your back. I adore every glance of your face resting in my lap. The innocence I see, the love for your family. I am cursed, so I'm still fighting trying to run the farthest from you. But running hurts just as bad as staying....

Visualize it

Race Model

Runners take your mark....
The moment is here, the stadium seems to be closing in on us. Stepping out in front of the blocks in my lane, I bend over and touch my toes, repeating this motion three times. Bending down, I'm backing into the blocks now. Flashbacks from practice surface. "foot to the outside of the pad d3". Taking my time to make sure both feet fit on the pad. Stretching out my hands, elbows locked. The moment is here. The only thing in my vision is the #2 down the middle of my blocks. "Set"..... Deep breath baby, eyes still fixed on 2
"powww" push away, shoulders moving forward, hips forward, head down, ahhhh the grunts are released as I push harder down the track. Gradually, naturally I come up. Here's the moment my feet quicken I'm hitting shorter than! It's going to throw me out the back.... Race ends 7.26

Diary

He was the turning point. 20 years of life had passed by, twenty years of living so passively. I always did let others get ahead, or take the first pick. Every guy I was really interested in I let them go by, because someone else deserved them right? I couldn't just let him go so easily. The stories started fast, he was interested in almost every girl I knew in a matter minutes. The old me would have just walked away and let them have him. I couldn't. Sometimes you have to fight for what you want. For the first time in my life I went for the guy I wanted. He turned out to be pretty amazing, and sweet. He taught me so much about myself, mostly to embrace myself.

A night of Fashion FACES&MBA

I have decided that it is a must for me to support and indulge in the local fashion scene. The city of Gainseville only offers so much, however something is better than nothing. UF's FACES modeling troupe and the minority business association put on a fashion show/business seminar. I enjoyed the show, the idea was amazing. Me and the girls had to take pictures afterwards Xoxo

Vintage Cali Bag

Everything thirted except my skirt from From forever21. I watched purple rain yesterday and the song has finally hit me as hard as it did in its hay day. It inspired me to look deep down and explain what I left unknown